Monday, March 31, 2014

Cattle on a thousand hills

I heard a story of a couple who was struggling financially. They had recently read in Psalms about how God "owns the cattle on a thousand hills" (Psalm 50:10). They were starting to worry and fear that they would lose everything they owned, despite their urgent prayers to God that seemed to go unanswered. They prayed for faith to trust God and knew He could provide for them, even if it meant He would sell some of His cattle on those hills. Seemed silly to ask such as request, but God said we "have not because we ask not." It was worth a shot and demonstrated child-like faith.

One day they got a knock on their door. A man whom they didn't know brought them a check for nearly the same amount they needed. He said he felt God led him to them. He told them he had recently sold some cattle, and God told him to take them the money. Wow! Coincidence? I don't think so. 

Now I don't know for sure if this story is true, but it wouldn't surprise me if it was. That's the kind of God we serve. 2 Chronicles 16:9 says, "For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him." God is a good Father and wants to take care of us. Sometimes He sustains us through the "storms" of life by providing the resources we need - even if it means selling His "cattle." Other times He sustains us spiritually and emotionally to help us endure the storms, even if it means we suffer loss and have to wait until He is ready to give us more. 

My dad owns cattle, and I have grown up around them my whole life. I know cattle can be sold to help provide for needs. My dad has sold cattle all his life and used the money to pay for needs in the family and for others. Therefore, that story about the couple being given money by a cattle farmer isn't that hard to comprehend for me. It actually makes me smile to think about, though I haven't always had the same appreciation for cattle as my dad, much to his dismay I am sure. 

The more I read about God's provision through scripture and in people's lives, including my own, the more I am amazed by Him. He really is crazy about us. I know He hates sin, but not just because He can't be around it due to His holiness. He hates sin also because He loves us so much and sees sin destroy us, His beloved creation. He came to get us out of the darkness, and is saddened when we keep running to it. 

This morning I got a daily devotional from a friend and it spoke to me just as I needed. Check it out below: 

Luke 9:13-14, NIV
 13 He replied, “You give them something to eat.”

They answered, “We have only five loaves of bread and two fish—unless we go and buy food for all this crowd.” 14 (About five thousand men were there.)
The commentary explained the verses:
When the disciples expressed concern about where the crowd of thousands would eat, Jesus offered a surprising solution: "You feed them." The disciples protested, focusing their attention on what they didn't have-food and money. Do you think God would ask you to do something that you and he together couldn't handle? Don't let your lack of resources blind you to seeing God's power.
Do you ever have trouble seeing, believing and experiencing God's power due to a lack of resources? I sure do. When we focus on our inabilities, our lack, our weaknesses, we lose sight of God's power. He is able to do far more than we think or imagine. Be blown away today by His love, provision, and power. 

May we be like Abraham as it says about him in Romans 4:20,
"...yet with respect to the promise of God, he did not waver in unbelief, but grew strong in faith, giving glory to God." 

Saturday, March 29, 2014

The Uncomfortable

When all of my junk came out in August 2011, if history would have determined how I would respond, then I would not be sitting here writing this blog. There is a long list of things that would have never occurred because I would not have done the work and been willing to face it. I also would have given in to feelings of inadequacy and shame. But, GOD CAME THROUGH!

As I have said in many of my blog posts, I don't know why it took such a tragedy to wake me up, AND I don't know why God saw fit to save me and our marriage. I am forever grateful and want to continually give Him the credit and allow Him to use it for good.

As we continue in year three of our recovery, to thrive more and more, I have to work on many areas of my life that are causing me to be "uncomfortable." It is uncomfortable in a different way than it was in the first two years. Now, it's about letting God mature me mentally and "toughen" me up to face areas of my life that I have avoided and been afraid to change/face.

Three areas that come to mind:
1. Public speaking
2. Spiritually leading my family
3. Financial freedom/intelligence/confidence, etc.

All three in their own particular way trigger feelings of insecurity for me. I am determined to change this. I am reading, listening to audios, praying, journaling, and applying knowledge learned in each of these areas. Guess what,  IT HAS BEEN VERY UNCOMFORTABLE. I get overwhelmed at times, and the past few weeks have stretched me quite a bit. But that's okay.

As someone said (I can't remember who said it): Do what it is uncomfortable long enough until it becomes comfortable.

This is obviously not talking about sinful things but areas of personal development and spiritual maturity. In the past, I would have avoided dealing with these areas of my life. I would have either been irritated every time my feelings of inadequacy popped up, or I would have been highly defensive and/or avoidant of doing anything about it. God has given me the courage to face them head on. Amy and I have survived a major life tragedy and know God is able to do what seems impossible. He is taking us deeper and deeper into a fuller understanding of who He is. It's quite amazing to witness firsthand.

It is still a struggle to undo years of thinking and settling. That's why it is called a "process" or "journey." It's a progressive thing, not a one time event. There are days I wish things were simpler and would "instantaneously" improve, but that would be a disservice to me and my family, and beyond. It's the process that produces the "fruit." 

In a parable in the Bible, the man asked Jesus, "If you are able..." Jesus said, "If I am able?" Jesus is very "able" and capable of doing way more than we give Him credit or allow Him to do. The better question for us to ask is, "Am I willing to let Him do all that He wants to do in and through my life?" Do I live life to the fullest "for His name sake" and seek to make an impact on our lost world? Many days I don't. On the days I do, it's life changing - and not just for me. It goes way beyond my small world and life.

I don't want to be known for being a Christ follower who "settles" for less than God's best. I also don't want to be remembered only for being a "moral failure." I don't want my story to end there. "But by the grace of God" it won't. It's part of our story, but new chapters are being written.

I want to be a living example of someone who God has transformed and done miracles in and through. As John the Baptist said, "I must decrease. He must increase." This happens through surrender, trust, submission, belief, and humility. It is all initiated by God, and He will carry it "on to completion." That's truth and good news. I want to hang on until He calls me home! Come Holy Spirit!
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Colossians 1:21, HCSB
21 Once you were alienated and hostile in your minds because of your evil actions. 22 But now He has reconciled you by His physical body[k] through His death, to present you holy, faultless, and blameless before Him— 23 if indeed you remain grounded and steadfast in the faith and are not shifted away from the hope of the gospel that you heard. This gospel has been proclaimed in all creation under heaven, and I, Paul, have become a servant of it.

Friday, March 28, 2014

A Life That Counts by John C. Maxwell

John Maxwell says things well. I am with him - "I want to live a life that counts." It's a worthy pursuit and won't come without challenges. God is bigger than anything I will ever face - including my past. That's good news for sure!
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A Life That Counts
by John C. Maxwell
Ben Franklin once wrote, "I would rather have it said ‘He lived usefully' than 'He died rich.'" More than just words, it was the way Franklin lived his life. One example of his useful nature was the invention of the Franklin stove. Instead of patenting it and keeping it to himself, Ben Franklin decided to share his invention with the world.
Instead of seeing the world in terms of how much money he could make, Franklin saw the world in terms of how many people he could help. To Benjamin Franklin, being useful was its own reward.
As I age, I gain perspective on the illusion of wealth and status as forms of fulfillment. I don't want my life to be measured by dollars and cents, or the number of books I've authored. Rather, I want to be remembered by the lives that I've touched. I want live a life that counts. With each day that passes, I feel a greater sense of urgency to make sure my time and energy are invested in developing leaders.
A life that counts is determined by:

1. The relationships that I form: Relationships help us to define who we are and what we can become. I consider relationships to be my greatest treasures in life and an immense source of joy.
Most people can trace their failures or successes to pivotal relationships. That's because all relationships involve transference. When we interact with others we exchange energy, emotions, ideas and values. Some relationships reinforce our values and uplift us, while others undercut our convictions and drain us. While we cannot choose every relationship in our lives, we get to select those who are closest to us.
Relationship Rules

  1. Get along with yourself: The one relationship you will have until you die is yourself.
  2. Value people: You cannot make another person feel important if you secretly feel that he or she is a nobody.
  3. Make the effort to form relationships: The result of a person who has never served others? Loneliness.
  4. Understand the Reciprocity Rule: Over time, people come to share reciprocal, similar attitudes toward each other.
  5. Follow the Golden Rule: The timeless principle: treat others the way you want to be treated.
2. The decisions that I make: Good decisions sometimes reap dividends years into the future, while bad decisions have a way of haunting us.
My friend, legendary basketball coach John Wooden, encourages leaders to, "Make every day your masterpiece." Two ingredients are necessary for each day to be a masterpiece: decisions and discipline. I like to think of decisions as goal-setting and discipline as goal-getting. Decisions and discipline cannot be separated because one is worthless without the other.
Good Decisions - Daily Discipline = A Plan without Payoff
Daily Discipline - Good Decisions = Regimentation without Reward
Good Decisions + Daily Discipline = A Masterpiece of Success
3. The experiences that I encounter: Our lives are also shaped by pivotal experiences. Whether triumphs or tragedies, our lives are molded by them. Perhaps we receive a long-awaited promotion or we're suddenly let go from a job. Perhaps a loved one passes away, or a newborn baby enters our lives. These experiences immerse us in emotions and challenge our convictions. They may even reveal our purpose in life.
Oftentimes, we're defined not so much in the moment of experience itself as in our response to the experience. Do we quit or rebound? Do we harbor bitterness or choose to forgive? Do we blame or improve? Whatever the case, the experiences in our lives profoundly touch us. The life experiences we encounter are broad and varied, but here are a few brief pointers on gaining the most from them.
  1. Evaluate experience: Experience isn't the best teacher. Evaluated experience is the best teacher. Learn from mistakes and victories alike. Draw upon experiences to grow and gain wisdom.
  2. Manage the emotional aspects of experience: Pivotal moments come with a flood of emotions—at times positive, and at times negative. Teach yourself to counteract negative feelings and learn to harness the momentum of positive emotions.
  3. Share them through storytelling: Experiences are my richest repositories of teaching material. Make a habit of sharing the lessons learned from the experiences that have shaped your life and your leadership.

Thursday, March 27, 2014

Doubt and Pout

There are days, more than I prefer to admit, when I "doubt and pout" about my circumstances and struggles. My prayers are pitiful at times, and I sound like either a spoiled child or a "doubting Thomas" needing reassurance and "proof." How quickly I forget how much God has done and how BIG He is.

A lot of my journey has been allowing the Lord to "renew" my mind, ridding me of old ways of thinking. Fear, unbelief and doubt can creep in and try to take over. I notice it most when money stresses start to occur, or when I get overwhelmed by a flooding of information that is new and challenging. I wish I would have learned these life lessons years ago as a young adult. Now, I am 39 years old having to learn things that would have made a huge difference in my teens and 20's. Better late than never. I don't have the mindset that I am "set in my ways" or "old dogs can't learn new tricks." I refuse to settle. I may "pout and doubt" some days, but I can't give in to fear. It's not an option.

This morning I had a reading assignment in Galatians 1, Ephesians 1, and Colossians 1. These came after a huge answer to prayer this morning. "Honey I shrunk, Jesus!" is a phrase that comes to mind when I read these powerful verses. How quickly I let my circumstances become bigger than Jesus! How ridiculous. He's HUGE and when I see Him as He really is and embrace His truth and promises, my circumstances seem so small and insignificant. I believe, Lord, help my unbelief!!!

God answers our prayers - in His time, in His way, and what's best. I have witnessed it firsthand over and over and over - yet I still have days where I waiver in unbelief. That's why our walk with Christ is a daily decision. That's why adultery recovery and "thriving" is a daily decision. Some days we walk in freedom and joy. Other days we are overwhelmed by fear, doubt, and uncertainty. God is gracious and is unchanged by our emotions and fears. He walks with us through it all, and even carries us when we can't walk. What a gracious and mighty God we serve.

I "doubted and pouted" this week, even this morning. God answered me anyway. I am humbled yet again. Man, He is enough and His grace is sufficient.
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Ephesians 1:3-6, The Message
3-6 How blessed is God! And what a blessing he is! He’s the Father of our Master, Jesus Christ, and takes us to the high places of blessing in him. Long before he laid down earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!) He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son.
7-10 Because of the sacrifice of the Messiah, his blood poured out on the altar of the Cross, we’re a free people—free of penalties and punishments chalked up by all our misdeeds. And not just barely free, either. Abundantly free! He thought of everything, provided for everything we could possibly need, letting us in on the plans he took such delight in making. He set it all out before us in Christ, a long-range plan in which everything would be brought together and summed up in him, everything in deepest heaven, everything on planet earth.
11-12 It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Grace with Space

I recently read the account of Stephen who was murdered for his faith (Acts 7). His last words on this Earth just before he died at the hands of the angry people who hated him and were killing him were, "Lord, do not hold this sin against them!" (Acts 7:60). Wow. What faith, grace and spiritual maturity. I am not there yet.

Still to this day, there are people and certain types of people that I am not very comfortable around - whether due to personality conflicts, past difficulties, temptation, misunderstanding, etc. I don't want to be judgmental or unkind, but at the same time, I don't want to put myself in situations that are questionable, potentially sinful, or ones that I cannot handle well "at this time."

I know that I have a lot of work to do as a Christ follower and "recovering" adulterer and "sinner." I am still a work in progress, regardless of how much growth I have experienced this past two and a half years. I am  overcoming years of personal and spiritual neglect. I want to keep moving forward and let God have His way in me - fully. Surrendering daily to Him is crucial. I wake up every day needing to remind myself of my need for Christ.

One question that I ask myself and God often is, "How do I do relate to people that I have difficulty being around, shouldn't be around, or need "time off" from, in a God-honoring way?" This week the thought came to mind that seems to help me process and understand this. Hopefully it is God speaking to me and not my flesh. Three words that gave me some clarity:

Grace with Space.

With God's help, I can offer grace and/or forgiveness, while maintaining personal space. I may not spend time with this person, become friends with them, or ever want to be around them, however, I can still have a spirit of grace. Or, when I take time "off" from the relationship, I can work on me and determine best what God wants to show me. He may say that the relationship is permanently over, or He may say wait a while. Or, He may be waiting on me to submit to His will and not "run" from His leading.

As the book by R.T. Kendall called Total Forgiveness teaches:
  • Forgiveness is not approval. 
  • Forgiveness is not the same as reconciliation. 
I want to continually pray through this issue and situation and honor God in my words and deeds. I definitely struggle to know how to best handle this type of matter. I never want to be judgmental and lack compassion, though I know I am capable of doing so. I also don't want to let guilt, temptation, or fear keep me from setting appropriate boundaries and walking in His freedom and truth. 
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Colossians 3:17, English Standard Version (ESV)

17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.


Tuesday, March 25, 2014

"Break a Habit. Make a Habit." by Josh Hunt

Here's a great exert from a book by John Hunt that someone sent to me that can enhance your personal and spiritual growth. Too often our habits and "hangups" keep us stuck spiritually, relationally, personally, and financially!
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Over-determine success

People who are successful at breaking habits or making habits overdetermine success. People who are unsuccessful ask, “What is the minimum requirement for achieving this goal?” Then, they do just a little bit less. People who are successful at achieving the goal do more—a lot more. Grant Cardone calls it the10X Rule. He recommends you make an estimation of effort and multiply that by 10. A little over the top, you say? How did you do in achieving your last goal? How did you do in breaking a habit last time? How did you do in establishing a habit last time? 10X might not be such a bad idea.
If you want to get your finances under control, make more spending cuts than you think will be necessary. Add in some creative ways of making some extra money, and sell a few things. That is what we mean by overdetermining success.
Losing 30 pounds is harder than you think. Plan to walk twice as far and twice as often as you think you will need to. Plan to cut back your calories more than you think is necessary. Things are often considerably more difficult than they appear.
Improving your marriage is more trouble than you imagine, but it can be done. Don’t plan on reading one book and hope you all will be well. Plan on reading a book a month for a year. Sit down on a loveseat with your spouse and read the book together— the same chapter read at the same time. Discuss as you go. Read a dozen books the first year. Read half a dozen the next year. Read one book a year for the rest of your life. This is what we mean by overdetermining success. It may seem like a lot of trouble, but not near as much trouble as a divorce.
Kerry Patterson speaks of making change inevitable. How would you like to make change inevitable? You do it by overdetermining success. The opposite leads to failure:
Believing that the road to success will be rocky leads to greater success, because it forces you to take action. People who are confident that they will succeed and equally confident that success won’t come easily, put in more effort, plan how to deal with problems before they arise, and persist longer in the face of difficulty.
Unrealistic optimists are less likely to consider all the possible turns the path to their goal might take. They are more likely to take risks without thinking things through. And they are only too happy to tell you that you are “being negative” when you dare to express concerns, harbor reservations, or dwell too long on obstacles that stand in hot water.[1]


[1] Halvorson, Heidi Grant (2011-10-24). Nine Things Successful People Do Differently (Kindle Locations 194-198). Harvard Business Review Press. Kindle Edition.

Contact me at josh@joshhhunt.com or 575.650.4564 for details.

Monday, March 24, 2014

Baseball Season

We are in the busy time of year for Spring baseball with our two boys. We've added soccer in there as well for our daughter. We love the whole "sports" scene, though we have to constantly guard against burn out and over doing it. It's a hard balance for sure.

This past weekend we had ball Friday, Saturday and Sunday. The ups and downs of travel ball can be quite entertaining at times, while other times it's very frustrating. There are "teachable moments" regularly, for us as parents and the players. Hopefully we are all being "teachable." Some days, well maybe most days, I realize how much learning I have yet to do.

For Amy and me, the ball field and baseball season used to have many negative "reminders." During those "dark" years, I was a terrible example on and off the field to others and my children. My irritability, anger, negativity, etc. led to many arguments, lots of tension, and lots of painful memories and regrets. I wish I could take back those early years and do things differently. Since I can't, I want to do better now that we are in a better place.

Coaching for me is no easy task due to my competitive spirit. I gave it up for two years and honestly thought I was done for good. It is something I still have to evaluate one season at a time. This year, I wanted to start easing back into it and see if I could do it better this time around. For the most part I have, but I still struggle to know if I need to be helping coach or sitting on the other side of the fence as a spectator alongside Amy. As long as I can be peaceful and enjoy it, I believe it will be a healing thing for us as a couple and family.

This weekend was a small "victory" for us. Saturday night Amy described our day as "pleasant." What she meant was I was pleasant. To me, that's a big compliment. If I can coach three games and be at the ball field all day and still be "pleasant," then that is exciting to me. Sadly, for many years I was very unpleasant. The last thing I want to do now is to disrupt the enjoyment of what Spring baseball can be for us and our children.

The more I grow and share our story with others, the more accountability I have and the more I want and need to stay active in my healing and recovery. I don't ever want to lose sight of the grace I have received. I want to deepen my walk with Christ and be full of His joy and faith. I want His aroma to flow from me, not my sinful nature - on and off the ball field.  _____________________________________________________________________

2 Corinthians 2:15-17, English Standard Version (ESV)

15 For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, 16 to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life. Who is sufficient for these things? 17 For we are not, like so many, peddlers of God's word, but as men of sincerity, as commissioned by God, in the sight of God we speak in Christ.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

National Day of Happiness

Today is National Day of Happiness. I want to celebrate it well. Even I, a recovering and thriving adulterer can, right? Not because I am happy about my sins and past. I am happy about my God and His forgiveness, grace, mercy, and character. This was affirmed this morning when I read Luke 7:36-50. It's comforting to read, since I have been forgiven much. Here's the text: 

Luke 7:36-50, The Message (MSG)

Anointing His Feet

36-39 One of the Pharisees asked him over for a meal. He went to the Pharisee’s house and sat down at the dinner table. Just then a woman of the village, the town harlot, having learned that Jesus was a guest in the home of the Pharisee, came with a bottle of very expensive perfume and stood at his feet, weeping, raining tears on his feet. Letting down her hair, she dried his feet, kissed them, and anointed them with the perfume. When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man was the prophet I thought he was, he would have known what kind of woman this is who is falling all over him.”
40 Jesus said to him, “Simon, I have something to tell you.”
“Oh? Tell me.”
41-42 “Two men were in debt to a banker. One owed five hundred silver pieces, the other fifty. Neither of them could pay up, and so the banker canceled both debts. Which of the two would be more grateful?”
43-47 Simon answered, “I suppose the one who was forgiven the most.”
“That’s right,” said Jesus. Then turning to the woman, but speaking to Simon, he said, “Do you see this woman? I came to your home; you provided no water for my feet, but she rained tears on my feet and dried them with her hair. You gave me no greeting, but from the time I arrived she hasn’t quit kissing my feet. You provided nothing for freshening up, but she has soothed my feet with perfume. Impressive, isn’t it? She was forgiven many, many sins, and so she is very, very grateful. If the forgiveness is minimal, the gratitude is minimal.”
48 Then he spoke to her: “I forgive your sins.”
49 That set the dinner guests talking behind his back: “Who does he think he is, forgiving sins!”
50 He ignored them and said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you. Go in peace.”
Jesus didn't approve of her sins; he approved of her, her faith, and her humility. Her level of gratitude was equal to her level of forgiveness. How amazing. I want to embrace this truth and live by such an example. I personally have been forgiven much, therefore, I want to express much gratitude and forgiveness of others.

Three powerful words Jesus concludes with, "Go in peace." Peace is HUGE to us all, but especially to us who have blown it big time. It took me a long time to experience His peace more fully. Jesus' acceptance and grace and forgiveness is a precursor to our peace. Others may judge us and/or be hurt by us, consequences may be big, but we can "go in peace" when we have been restored by Jesus, the "shame destroyer." That gets me excited and fires me up!

I want to be a difference maker, not a home wrecker. Today I can celebrate happiness. So can you! Check out this short video about happiness.It's good stuff. Be happy today.
http://rogers.nowsender.com/e/vd?smu8xp


Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Until an opportune time

Luke 4:13, "When the devil had finished every temptation, he left Him until an opportune time." 

It's this verse that reminds me to do at a minimum two things each morning/day:
1. Delight in the Lord and meet with Him personally and enjoy fellowship with Him. This impacts everything I do and everyone I am around - especially Amy, my children, and others.

2. Put on my battle gear. The evil one, i.e. the devil/Satan, is waiting to trip me up and lead me astray. I know what sins I am capable of and the devil knows as well. This is why accountability and walking with a "band of brothers" is so important. I don't want to do battle alone. It's foolish and even unbiblical.

I failed for most of my life as a Christ follower to do these two things. It cost me dearly. Now, I want to keep growing, seeking, praying, striving for more of the Lord. I try to do this every morning, but I still have hard days of moodiness, confusion about the direction the Lord is leading me in, etc. I still get bothered by things that I shouldn't. I get overwhelmed and have fears that keep me stuck.

At the same time, God has given me gratitude that keeps things in perspective. He shows me how He is at work in and around me. He enables me to enjoy my family more. He gives me the courage to open up to guys about personal matters. He is walking with me through a time of learning, stretching and maturing that is not easy but is taking me places that I would never go on my own.

Luke 4:13 is a reminder that the temptation will come. The verse right after that reflects how Jesus stood up to temptation and had such boldness, wisdom, and victory...

Luke 4:14, "And Jesus returned to Galilee in the power of the Spirit..."

The power of the Spirit. What a gift from God. My efforts and strength are useless and powerless, but the Spirit's power is unhindered. Fill me up, Lord, each day!! Temptation and the devil's schemes have no hold on us when the Spirit is in us. Am I letting the Spirit lead or my flesh? I hope I allow the Spirit to lead.

This week started out with me feeling overwhelmed by various tasks at hand. I am still struggling a bit to do the tasks and not give in to doubt. However, I realize that I have been focusing on the wrong thing - me. God has proven faithful over and over to me - why am I focusing on my limitations rather than His power? It's crazy. When I focus on Him and His power, all the fears and doubts go away. They have no hold in comparison to Him.

I believe, Lord, help my unbelief! Be HUGE in my life and heart and soul today! 


Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Leaving a Legacy

Great article to pass on today...Enjoy.

Leaving a Legacy–Principles to Live By
by Jim Rohn

You know me, I am a philosopher. I love principles. Yes, actions are great and I talk about them regularly, but the important stuff is what lies underneath—the principles.
Here are what I consider to be the principles that we must commit to if we are to leave the legacy we desire:
1. Life is best lived in service to others. This doesn't mean that we do not strive for the best for ourselves. It does mean that in all things we serve other people, including our family, co-workers and friends.
2. Consider others' interests as important as your own. Much of the world suffers simply because people consider only their own interests. People are looking out for number one, but the way to leave a legacy is to also look out for others. 
3. Love your neighbor even if you don't like him. It is interesting that Jesus told us to love others. But he never tells us to like them. Liking people has to do with emotions. Loving people has to do with actions. And what you will find is that when you love them and do good by them, you will more often than not begin to like them.
4. Maintain integrity at all costs. There are very few things you take to the grave with you. The number one thing is your reputation and good name. When people remember you, you want them to think, "She was the most honest person I knew. What integrity." There are always going to be temptations to cut corners and break your integrity. Do not do it. Do what is right all of the time, no matter what the cost.
5. You must risk in order to gain. In just about every area of life you must risk in order to gain the reward. In love, you must risk rejection in order to ask that person out for the first time. In investing you must place your capital at risk in the market in order to receive the prize of a growing bank account. When we risk, we gain. And when we gain, we have more to leave for others.
6. You reap what you sow. In fact, you always reap more than you sow—you plant a seed and reap a bushel. What you give you get. What you put into the ground then grows out of the ground. If you give love you will receive love. If you give time, you will gain time. It is one of the truest laws of the universe. Decide what you want out of life and then begin to sow it.
7. Hard work is never a waste. No one will say, "It is too bad he was such a good, hard worker." But if you aren't they will surely say, "It's too bad he was so lazy—he could have been so much more!" Hard work will leave a grand legacy. Give it your all on your trip around the earth. You will do a lot of good and leave a terrific legacy.
8. Don't give up when you fail. Imagine what legacies would have never existed if someone had given up. How many thriving businesses would have been shut down if they quit at their first failure? Everyone fails. It is a fact of life. But those who succeed are those who do not give up when they fail. They keep going and build a successful life—and a legacy.
9. Don't ever stop in your pursuit of a legacy. Many people have accomplished tremendous things later on in life. There is never a time to stop in your pursuit of a legacy. Sometimes older people will say, "I am 65. I'll never change." That won't build a great life! No, there is always time to do more and achieve more, to help more and serve more, to teach more and to learn more. Keep going and growing that legacy!
These are core principles to live by if you want to become the kind of person who leaves a lasting legacy.
Benefit from the legacy that legendary personal achievement expert Jim Rohn left us and have him as your mentor in his One-Year Success Plan, available at JimRohn.com. It’s never too late to incorporate a system that helps you stay focused and on course for reaching personal and professional goals. 

Monday, March 17, 2014

Guard Your Heart

Over the past two weeks, I went through an emotional funk that bothered both me and Amy. I finally talked about the "funk" instead of trying to deal with it privately. Thursday I talked to the children's minister at our church. Amy and I finally talked about it as well. Instantly I felt freed up and better, though I hated it had gotten to a place of "concern" for her.

Friday morning I opened up to my men's accountability group and three of them followed up with me to check on me. Then, over the weekend, I was able to "clear the air" with another guy. Finally, the funk left and I felt and feel WAY better, freer. It was a big reminder to me to not let things linger, and to not try to go solo on sorting through the emotional roller coaster and spiritual turmoil.

For two weeks, I neglected to open up to others and Amy in order to deal with my struggle. Busyness and isolation can be a big enemy if we let it. I am grateful that Amy and I were able to openly talk about it and get through it together. I am also grateful for friends here who are available and willing to walk with me through the ups and downs. As one of my friends said, "It's okay to grieve." He knows our story fully and recognizes both the victories and pain we've experienced.

I believe what triggered the funk was several factors: doing a good bit of writing about our past two and a half years, sharing my testimony publicly with the youth group, and then getting a letter from my licensing board with the stipulations for my probation - all three weighed heavy on me in a short span of time. None of those things is bad; just a lot to take in.

I have realized yet again how important relationships are to me. Men to walk with are VERY important and keeps me encouraged, accountable and deepens my walk. Sharing life with Amy and being able to keep our family not only intact but thriving and growing, even during the struggles, is a testimony of God's goodness.

Knowing Amy and I are together as a team, and having a "band of brothers," gives me the confidence and courage to walk head on through the difficulties and struggles. I am still praying for God to show me His plan, His direction and to continue to guide me in career, personally, and more. I still have things I want to sort out and understand, but I am not alone. I know isolation and giving in to fear and doubt won't set me free. God has shown me that, even this past week.

Our memory verse this week came at a good time. It's truth is a powerful reminder about the condition of our hearts and the need to "guard" it: 

Proverbs 4:23, New International Version (NIV)
23 Above all else, guard your heart,
    for everything you do flows from it.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Practice Being Like a Child

This article came to my email inbox yesterday. How appropriate and true. May we "adults" not lose sight of this practice...I know I have to be reminded often. Having three children of my own helps keep thing "in check." I still have a tendency to act like a "grumpy" adult. Not cool. Keep me child-like, Lord!
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Practice Being Like a Child
by Jim Rohn 

Remember the master teacher once said 2,000 years ago, “Unless you can become like little children, your chances are zero; you haven’t got a prayer.” A major consideration for adults.

Be like children and remember there are four ways to be more like a child no matter how old you get… 

1) Curiosity—Be curious; childish curiosity. What will kids do if they want to know something bad enough? You’re right. They will bug you. Kids can ask a million questions. You think they’re through. They’ve got another million. They will keep plaguing you. They can drive you right to the brink. Kids also use their curiosity to learn. Have you ever noticed that while adults are stepping on ants, children are studying them? A child’s curiosity is what helps them to reach, learn and grow.
 
2) Excitement—Learn to get excited like a child. There is nothing that has more magic than childish excitement. So excited you hate to go to bed at night. Can’t wait to get up in the morning. So excited that you’re about to explode. How can anyone resist that kind of childish magic? Now, once in awhile I meet someone who says, “Well, I’m a little too mature for all that childish excitement.” Isn’t that pitiful? You’ve got to weep for these kinds of people. All I’ve got to say is, “If you’re too old to get excited, you’re old.” Don’t get that old. 

3) Faith—Faith is childish. How else would you describe it? Some people say, “Let’s be adult about it.” Oh no. No. Adults too often have a tendency to be overly skeptical. Some adults even have a tendency to be cynical. Adults say, “Yeah, I’ve heard that old positive line before. It will be a long day in June before I fall for that positive line. You’ve got to prove to me it’s any good.” See, that’s adult, but kids aren’t that way.

Kids think you can get anything. They are really funny. You tell kids, “We’re going to have three swimming pools.” And they say, “Yeah. Three. One each. Stay out of my swimming pool.” See, they start dividing them up right away, but adults are not like that. Adults say, “Three swimming pools? You’re out of your mind. Most people don’t even have one swimming pool. You’ll be lucky to get a tub in the back yard.” You notice the difference? No wonder the master teacher said, “Unless you can become like little children, your chances, they’re skinny.” 

4) Trust—Trust is a childish virtue, but it has great merit. Have you heard the expression “Sleep like a baby”? That’s it. Childish trust. After you’ve gotten an A+ for the day, leave it in somebody else’s hands.
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Matthew 18:2-4, New American Standard Bible (NASB)
And He called a child to Himself and set him [a]before them, and said, “Truly I say to you, unless you [b]are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Awesome reminders this morning

As I read this morning in a study I am doing with a group of men, the powerful truths of God were brought back to my mind. God seems to speak exactly what we need, when we need it; if I would but listen more and seek Him more fully.

The two awesome reminders this morning are:

1) My Heavenly Father knows what I need, even before I ask. I don't have to try to "figure it out." In relationship with Him daily, and in His way and time, He will show me. Do I trust Him with this truth? Not always, but when I do, my life has much different meaning and more joy.
Matthew 6:7-8, NASB
“And when you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition as the Gentiles do, for they suppose that they will be heard for their many words. So do not be like them; for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.
2) He alone provides full satisfaction. The world can't fulfill the desires of my soul. When I trust that He is good and can fully satisfy, I will not walk away disappointed. I have tried living off the "junk" of the world, and was disappointed every time. Not so with the LORD.
Psalm 34:8-10, NASB
O taste and see that the Lord is good;
How blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!
O fear the Lord, you His saints;
For to those who fear Him there is no want.
10 The young lions do lack and suffer hunger;
But they who seek the Lord shall not be in want of any good thing.
I need these reminders daily. The LORD has so many truths that He wants us to rest in and trust. We will never get weary of His ways when we "taste and see that the LORD is good." We will stop believing the lies of the world, and fully embrace Him. I believe, Lord, help my unbelief!
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Psalm 27:4, NASB 
One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
To behold the [a]beauty of the Lord And to [b]meditate in His temple.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Amy's Journey

Reading Amy's blog post from yesterday caused me to rejoice. Her post is a testimony to the growth I have witnessed first hand. It still amazes me how surprised I get by God's goodness. I guess for so long I didn't experience it fully and honestly was afraid to. His goodness was there and He was active, but I was the hold up, the hang up. He put amazing people in my life who could have made a bigger difference, if only I would have had the courage to let them. 

Adultery shatters lives, but God can and does rebuild lives after it happens. We are grateful to be in that process of rebuilding and "thriving" despite the devastation. May we never settle again for less or believe the lies of the evil one.

Here's Amy's post from yesterday. In Search of the Meaningful. Enjoying God's Goodness is the title of her blog. How true it is.


Monday, March 10, 2014

God uses our Plan B's


So maybe it’s fair to say that while God doesn’t need our tragedies to transform us, He certainly uses our Plan B’s to bring about change in our lives. Pete Wilson, author of Plan B

Saturday, March 8, 2014

5 Things I am Thankful For


Since the "fallout of 2011," my eyes have been opened to the joy of living in pursuit of God's best - as only He is able to allow and ensure. It's been a daily struggle to let go of the baggage in my heart and soul and let God do His slow and steady work in me.

5 Things I am thankful for... (in no particular order)

1. My children - This weekend has already proven to be full of fun and amazement. It's been me and the "boys" (my two sons) since Friday morning. Claire is playing hard with her cousin Chloe, probably squealing and laughing constantly. They love each other so much. It's nice to be within a two and a half hour drive to be able to visit. It's only an hour when we meet up halfway, which is what we did this weekend.

Me and the boys have had a great time, starting with Friday morning. We spent the day together in Corinth laughing and reconnecting, which was long overdue. There has been some tension over the past couple of weeks due to stresses with school and some behaviors needing to be "readjusted." This weekend, we are having a blast. We watched a movie together last night. This morning we ran the Amanda Price 5K/10K. They were so excited. They got up at 6:30 am and were ready to roll out of the driveway before 7:30 am. They both had a great race and loved their fellowship with their friends. They are now playing hard with friends in the neighborhood.

2. Amy - Amy is in Jackson with friends and business partners being trained and edified. Her personal and spiritual growth this year has been amazing. She has stepped out of her "shell" more and more over the past two and a half years. It's such a blessing to see her grow as a woman and person. She continues to amaze me.

3. Health and fitness - good health is something most of us take for granted until we lose it. Since 2012, I have realized I was not taking good care of myself, particularly with nutrition. Amy and I had to make some lifestyle adjustments when it comes to food, and it has paid off. I have lost over 15 pounds and kept it off for over a year and a half. The Advocare products combined with healthy eating has made a huge difference in how we feel daily. Since September 2013, I have been part of a running group in town. It has pushed me to get out and exercise daily, for good physical AND mental health. It is a great group of people who thrive on encouraging each other. This morning I ran the 10K and had a great race. I am thankful to be able to run hard and enjoy physical fitness. I never want to take this for granted.

4. Friends and community - The greater enjoyment today at the 10K race was the fellowship with our new friends in this community. I wasn't sure I would ever experience such close community again since all of the junk that happened in 2011. It is truly a God-sized blessing.

Even more shocking was the number of texts I have received from guy friends of mine asking how my race went. I can't believe I have such a long list of guys here in our community who lift me up and provide encouragement and friendship. And, the more amazing thing is that they know our story. They know how much of a prodigal I was and still choose to befriend me and care for me. Wow! I want to return the favor to them and be a great friend who cares at all times.

5. Being "uncomfortable" - For a long time, I resisted getting help with my many weaknesses and struggles. Though I was very uncomfortable with myself and in my sin, I have now seen how much God can do when I allow Him to make me "uncomfortable" during the sanctification/growth process. Speaking to people about our "story" is uncomfortable, but it is healing, therapeutic, and hopefully helpful to others. Letting go of a lot of baggage is "uncomfortable" for awhile, but it's freeing to work through the struggle. Facing the many consequences of my sin is "uncomfortable" but it has helped free me up, hold me accountable, and strengthen me more and more. I would have never experienced such growth had I run from such consequences. I wish I hadn't done the things that caused my consequences, but I want to continue to become better as a result of them - For His Name Sake.
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God is so good to show me such blessings. I don't want to waste them. With His help, I want others to praise Him, not me. God is the One who deserves the credit. He's the hero. Though I don't know why He still is at work in my life, it is a reflection of the truth that His "faithfulness" does not depend on mine. At the same time, He is a loving Father who gives good gifts; mostly the gift of Himself. Opening that gift never gets old.


Thursday, March 6, 2014

My First Public Venue Talk

About three weeks ago, Chad, a new friend of mine who is a youth minister in Tupelo, asked if I would share some of our story with his youth (7th - 12th graders). It was a series he was doing where adults and youth told their stories on Wednesday nights, over the course of a few months. I agreed to do it, since I have prayed that if God opened doors for me to share, that I would willingly do so.

Last night was the talk. As I arrived at the church, I got very nervous. This would be the first time I stood in a public venue and shared since our journey began in 2011. I have shared in a small group and 1 on 1 with people, and regularly on this blog, but this was a step up. I HATE getting choked up when speaking, so I worried a bit about that. I would be talking to junior high and senior high youth - how embarrassing. I reminded myself that it wasn't about me. It was about making God the hero and showing that sin has huge consequences. God's grace is bigger than our sin thankfully!

I think the talk went pretty good. I choked up a few times, but that's part of the process. It's more enjoyable to be funny, but for years I hid behind humor to mask my sin and shame. Now, I want to be real, transparent, and lay it out there showing that God works in the light. Though the talk was tough due to the sensitive  personal nature of it, I am honored that Chad asked me to speak. I hope the youth got something out of it. I believe teenagers and children need to see adults be real and vulnerable. If anything, that's what they got out of it.

I know some of those youth are struggling, even some of their families with adultery and sexual sin. There are probably others living a "double life" that no one knows about. Others may be headed in the direction of a sinful path. Some may be coming out of a season of sin. Hard to say.

I told the youth that our story and journey is not over. I still have to tell our children someday. I am still having to work with my licensing board. I still have to do the daily work of healing, accountability, and overcoming my past as I head toward a better future. I told them that I am grateful and amazed that my marriage is better than it has been in 17 years; that I am in a better place spiritually than I've ever been and that I wouldn't change where we are now. However, I would change the path it took to get here.

I urged them to trust that "confession leads to freedom" and not to settle for less than God's best. Living on the "trash" of the world won't satisfy. Let God do immeasurably more than they can think or imagine! Sin sucks like hell, but God is good. Yes, I said that to youth, in a Baptist church. Sorry, Amy. :)

I am in awe of God's goodness. It is so tempting to let shame say "I shouldn't be speaking at a church," etc., but that would give the devil too much pleasure. I don't take credit for what God has done, and I am still amazed that I get to experience His grace and the grace of others. 

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Believing is Seeing

Over the past few months, my "vision" has started clearing up. I am starting to see a better, freer, future. For the past two and a half years, I have witnessed "miracles" of God regularly. He helped me move out of a dark past, and into a present with hope and amazement. The next step for me in 2014 and beyond is to keep learning from the past, find joy in the here and now and anticipate AND visualize/pursue a hopeful future. It took awhile to overcome feelings of unworthiness to even consider it an option for me, a "moral failure."

I have been listening to and reading several books, articles, etc. that take that anticipation to a deeper level. Simply hoping for a greater future won't automatically make it happen. Having a plan that is in line with God's will is crucial. AND, seeing in my mind that future lived out makes it more personal, real, and within reach. I have often either not visualized much of a future for myself, at least not one of seeing God do HUGE things, OR I failed to dream or visualize anything at all (due to numbness, fear, shame, ignorance, etc).

I read the article below this morning that talks about "seeing is believing OR is believing is what leads to seeing." It is by Denis Waitley and makes good sense.
Do you have to see it before you believe it, or believe before you can see it? The answer is: Both are basically true. If you can see something in your mind's eye, and you imagine it over and over again, you will begin to believe it is really there in substance. As a result, your actions, both physical and mental, will move to bring about in reality the image you are visualizing.

Whatever you see or experience, real or imagined, consciously or subliminally, when repeated vividly over and over, does affect your behavior, and definitely can influence you to buy a product or buy into a lifestyle, good or bad. Your attitude and beliefs are, quite simply, functions of what you see day in and day out.
Information can be taken in almost unnoticed. You won't react to it until later, and you still won't be aware of what lies behind your response. In other words, what you see really is what you get, regardless of whether you know it or not.
By seeing from within, in your mind's eye, you can change your life. For example, by rehashing fears and problems, you can make yourself depressed. As a result, you can botch a business deal, hurt a relationship, or lower your performance. By forecasting a gloomy outcome in your mind's eye, you can act as your own witch doctor and practice a modern-day kind of voodoo that will fulfill your negative prediction with uncanny accuracy.
On the other hand, by replaying in your mind's eye the best game you ever played, you can repeat that best game again, when the stakes are even higher and the pressure is on. And by mentally pre-playing the best game you've ever imagined, you can set the stage for a world-class performance. This "instant replay" and "instant pre-play" applies to anything from a successful sales call or athletic event to the effective motivation of your teammates and children.
Choose your role models and inputs carefully. Your attitudes and beliefs are the software programs driving you every day on life's journey.
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Hebrews 11:1, The Message (MSG)

Faith in What We Don’t See

11 1-2 The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It’s our handle on what we can’t see. The act of faith is what distinguished our ancestors, set them above the crowd.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Difficulties

Over the past couple of weeks, I have had some "mood swings" that have bothered me. I am sure my children were a bit confused by them as well. I don't like being moody and want to stay positive and upbeat all of the time, though I know that's not a reality for me. I have growth yet to do.

I asked Collin one night after a long day of me feeling very irritable, "Do you ever get in a bad mood and don't know why?" He said, "Yes." I then confessed my terrible mood and apologized for being so reactive that day. He and I had a great talk. He is very insightful. He revealed to me how important it is for me to stay aware of their need to be affirmed and blessed by me. They also need my discipline and guidance. I want to balance it well, but I have missed the mark I must admit.

I have also had some days of overflowing joy. I am experiencing numerous blessings that I am grateful for. God is at work in and around me, and I want to take it all in. I want to experience His abundance, in whatever form that may mean. I want to live out of overflow and amazement of Him. Moving into year three of our healing journey has allowed me to do that more fully. Various circumstances and difficulties that still exist due to my consequences from 2011 (and way before) make it challenging, but not hopeless.

It's tempting in the midst of difficulties to lose heart and feel overwhelmed. I have to battle against it daily, though the stronger I get in this area, the more I am able to press on instead of giving in to despair or shame. I try to look at my circumstances more neutrally. Instead of letting myself get all worked up and burdened by "what if's" or think about all of the regrets I have, I think about my walk with God. He's with me. He knows my need and struggle. He wants me to trust and obey, and trust His heart. My heart and affection is what He longs for.

When difficulties arise, it's tempting to focus on solutions and try to fix things on my own. As Stephen Eyre said about our struggle to feel God's presence: "Scripture becomes a book of principles to be applied. Prayer is a shopping list of things God is supposed to do. Difficulties in life are problems God is supposed to solve. When we are blind to God, what God is doing in us in the midst of difficulties is overlooked."

On my own, I can't fix anything. I want to follow His lead and do only what He leads me to do. At times, He delays in showing me what to do next. Those moments of silence make it tough, especially when panic tries to set in. God sees the big picture, I don't. When I abide in Him and trust His provision, I better submit to Him and enjoy the process more fully. I am going to have ups and downs emotionally and spiritually, but He remains true and steady. That's good to know!

This morning I was tempted to start trying to figure out several things that don't really have an answer yet. In time, I will see the fruit of my pursuits, but it may take time; God's time. Like David in the Psalms, I want to thirst for God and know Him more and more. Focusing on my difficulties or circumstances won't lead to that. "Growing in appreciation of God's might, majesty, and beauty" will. What a ride to be on, one day at a time. God never promised it to be easy but it's a journey worth pursuing.
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Psalm 42, The Message (MSG)

42 1-3 A white-tailed deer drinks from the creek; I want to drink God, deep draughts of God. I’m thirsty for God-alive. I wonder, “Will I ever make it—  arrive and drink in God’s presence?” I’m on a diet of tears—tears for breakfast, tears for supper. All day long people knock at my door, Pestering, “Where is this God of yours?”
These are the things I go over and over, emptying out the pockets of my life.
I was always at the head of the worshiping crowd, right out in front, Leading them all, eager to arrive and worship, Shouting praises, singing thanksgiving—celebrating, all of us, God’s feast!
Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul? Why are you crying the blues?
Fix my eyes on God— soon I’ll be praising again. He puts a smile on my face. He’s my God.