Baseball Season

We are in the busy time of year for Spring baseball with our two boys. We've added soccer in there as well for our daughter. We love the whole "sports" scene, though we have to constantly guard against burn out and over doing it. It's a hard balance for sure.

This past weekend we had ball Friday, Saturday and Sunday. The ups and downs of travel ball can be quite entertaining at times, while other times it's very frustrating. There are "teachable moments" regularly, for us as parents and the players. Hopefully we are all being "teachable." Some days, well maybe most days, I realize how much learning I have yet to do.

For Amy and me, the ball field and baseball season used to have many negative "reminders." During those "dark" years, I was a terrible example on and off the field to others and my children. My irritability, anger, negativity, etc. led to many arguments, lots of tension, and lots of painful memories and regrets. I wish I could take back those early years and do things differently. Since I can't, I want to do better now that we are in a better place.

Coaching for me is no easy task due to my competitive spirit. I gave it up for two years and honestly thought I was done for good. It is something I still have to evaluate one season at a time. This year, I wanted to start easing back into it and see if I could do it better this time around. For the most part I have, but I still struggle to know if I need to be helping coach or sitting on the other side of the fence as a spectator alongside Amy. As long as I can be peaceful and enjoy it, I believe it will be a healing thing for us as a couple and family.

This weekend was a small "victory" for us. Saturday night Amy described our day as "pleasant." What she meant was I was pleasant. To me, that's a big compliment. If I can coach three games and be at the ball field all day and still be "pleasant," then that is exciting to me. Sadly, for many years I was very unpleasant. The last thing I want to do now is to disrupt the enjoyment of what Spring baseball can be for us and our children.

The more I grow and share our story with others, the more accountability I have and the more I want and need to stay active in my healing and recovery. I don't ever want to lose sight of the grace I have received. I want to deepen my walk with Christ and be full of His joy and faith. I want His aroma to flow from me, not my sinful nature - on and off the ball field.  _____________________________________________________________________

2 Corinthians 2:15-17, English Standard Version (ESV)

¹⁵ For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, ¹⁶ to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life. Who is sufficient for these things? ¹⁷ For we are not, like so many, peddlers of God's word, but as men of sincerity, as commissioned by God, in the sight of God we speak in Christ.