Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Some Things to Consider, Part 2
As stated in the previous post, ending your affair(s) and all contact is a huge first step that can cause difficulties for everyone involved. The more intense the affair(s) was, the harder it may be for someone to end. Each situation is different, but the same action is needed: end it. Once ended, it will require work on all parties involved to process the pain well and not let it hinder your recovery.
The second thing to consider for your recovery journey is another challenging, but very important step. This is where far too many couples give up because of the difficulty in persevering.
#2 Walk through the pain, not away from it.
The last thing you need to do is run from your pain. Unhealthy ways to deal with your pain is through worldly means such as workaholism, drugs/alcohol, denial, pornography, gambling, and other sinful addictions and behaviors.
"When it becomes apparent your dreams are not coming true and you feel you’ve been stripped of everything, this is not the time to run. It’s not the time to take things into your own hands. It’s definitely not the time to turn your back on God. This is when you need God more than ever before. You need to lean on Him instead of running away." Pete Wilson, Plan B
Walking through the “fire” of healing and facing your sin is vital. Jesus knows your needs and wants you to run to His “throne of grace.” It takes courage to own up to your sin and get help. Your feelings will be all over the map ranging from shame, fear, confusion, anger, sadness, anxiety, stress, and beyond. Acknowledge them, ask God to help you manage them, and work the process of healing. Healing takes time and work. God is faithful and will carry you through the valleys and mountains of recovery.
You will be tempted to give up when things get difficult. No one likes pain, me included. Adultery recovery is tough. Some days the pain is so heavy, it feels like you won't survive it or can't endure any more. Try not to give up. Pray for God's intervention and to send His Holy Spirit to strengthen you, encourage you, guide you, and give you wisdom.
Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love him. James 1:12